Courtney (is trademarked)

Happy Saint Patricks Day!

2010-03-17T09:15:00.000-07:00

I dont have much to say, Im trying to do all my homework today so I can have the whole weekend to myself! I have a love hate relationship with spring break. I love it because i can do whatever i want and not have to go to class, but i get extremly bored. I did line up some dvds to watch, but those are through. Im going to go get my taxes done so hopefully that will kill some hours. haha

here are some pictures that explain my life right now . hope you enjoy

We dyed the shop dog green! its so cute.

Ethan getting his hair cut, hes such a ham! whenever we go in there he flirts with all the ladies and they load him up with sugar.

MMMM bob evans! so good. I love soaking their buns in honey (lol) and getting this coffee drink! try it, i hate whipped cream but theirs tastes like ice cream!

My sister, Ethan, and myself at a wedding

and now pictures that just make me smile =]

if i ate these there would be a party in my tummy, so yummy so yummy!

Mario, chose the racoon outfit, you always looked so cute in it!

mmm starbucks. have you tried their new white chocolate cherry? or chocolate cherry? DO IT!

I hope everyone has a AWESOME st patricks day! drink a lot of green beer for me!

Also if anyone wants to share blog buttons please let me know!

2010-03-15T20:36:00.000-07:00

I wish my life was more entertaining so i would have more things to post about. All in all, life is pretty good, Andrew and I are officially dating. but since im such a weird comittiment person, we are presently openly dating. My choice. but he wants to be exclusive. So basically, im openly dating, and hes waiting for me to be okay with just being with him. The thing is, im not dating anyone else. I just need to ease into things my way.

I'm finally on spring break. I wasnt even stressed out about school, till spring break hit and then it dawned on me that I have to go back for another two months before summer. At least the weather will be nicer.

So, I need to ask you a question. Would you be offended if you were invited to a bridal shower but were not invited to the actual wedding?
yeah, i know what youre thinking, its kind of tacky, but what if i threw in it was a small destination wedding? would that change your mind.

i was a little ticked that this happened to me, but i made my friend a gift and decided to go to the shower and just grin and bear it, till i was literally one of the only people who did not get an invite. i cant really ask her right?
I dont even know why i wasnt to be honest, she knew i could afford it. so i dont know. What is the right thing to do? My boss/friend tami told me to just ask her because its obviously bugging me. but i dont want to come off as someone who is begging to go or trying to invite herself or feels shes entitled to go. but why go through asking me to the bridal shower? it just makes me feel like she was using me to get a gift? but shes not like that. i dont know, its a tough situation.

but here are some pictures from the party and the gift i made her.

the gift i made

awesome bag. i hate all pinks but this pale shade

the most amazing pasta salad EVER.

the best cupcakes in the world, they are from a local store here called the cakery

they melt in your mouth! so good, i couldnt even handle it

Kelly reading my card. I wrote:

"Marriage is an institution in which a man loses is bachelors degree and the woman earns her masters. ha, but with all joking aside kelly, i wish you and eric a lifetime of happiness and an eternity of love."

yeah, i love those one liners =]

she started to cry. yeah, i made the bride cry.

All in all i had fun, i just felt a little left out for not being invited, she does however want me to come out this summer and spend some time with her. shes a great friend but you could see why my feelings were hurt.

All i know is she got like a mass majority of pyrex stuff at her shower and im so jealous! i love me some good bakeware!

Wishlist Wednesday!

2010-03-10T19:06:00.000-08:00

I have been eyeing a couple things in different stores but i cant seem to muster up enough courage to purchase them. here they are!

http://sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P254638&categoryId=S11505&shouldPaginate=true#

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=ACC&product%5Fid=1073279879&showBACK=OK

http://www.target.com/Owl-Nature-Decorative-Pillow-12/dp/B002KM5H4K/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&searchView=grid5&qid=1268275970&frombrowse=0&fromGsearch=true&node=1038576%7C1287991011&keywords=owl&searchSize=30&id=Owl%20Nature%20Decorative%20Pillow%2012&searchBinNameList=subjectbin%2Ctarget_com_age%2Ctarget_com_gender-bin%2Ctarget_com_character-bin%2Cprice%2Ctarget_com_primary_color-bin%2Ctarget_com_size-bin%2Ctarget_com_brand-bin&searchNodeID=1038576%7C1287991011&searchRank=target104545&sr=1-7&searchPage=1

http://www.target.com/Deco-Breeze-DBF0365-DecoBreeze-Figurine/dp/B001OVDNYE/ref=sr_1_23?ie=UTF8&searchView=grid5&qid=1268275970&frombrowse=0&fromGsearch=true&node=1038576%7C1287991011&keywords=owl&searchSize=30&id=Deco%20Breeze%20DBF0365%20DecoBreeze%20Figurine&searchBinNameList=subjectbin%2Ctarget_com_age%2Ctarget_com_gender-bin%2Ctarget_com_character-bin%2Cprice%2Ctarget_com_primary_color-bin%2Ctarget_com_size-bin%2Ctarget_com_brand-bin&searchNodeID=1038576%7C1287991011&searchRank=target104545&sr=1-23&searchPage=1

2010-02-25T21:06:00.000-08:00

The other day my son and i ventured off to the science center. I dont know if they have one in your area but its a free place you can go and just look at all things science.

http://www.slsc.org/default.aspx for reference. well of course they have a pretty awesome gift store. and they had Astronaunt food! I have always wanted to try it. FREEZED DRIED FOOD. doesnt that just sound yummy?

As i looked the only thing that seems to interest my tummy was the freeze dried ice cream.
How can anyone botch ice cream. I mean they even deep fry it. it cant be that bad, so i purchased some and went home.

I later went over to Andrew's house and conned him into trying some with me.

looks yummy right? the store clerk told me it was SO GOOD. and that it had the same texture as the marshmellows in lucky charms. ( they were wrong, very wrong.) It by far has been one of the nastiest things I have ever tasted in my entire life. Andrew was not a big fan of it either. I dont even think he swallowed his.

"yay im so excited!"

It was the hardest thing ever, think of biting straight into a jawbreaker

not impressed

"I really hate you for doing this to me"

the HORROR!

It was by the far, i cant even describe it! I do not suggest this to anyone, maybe though, your worst enemy.

2010-02-19T19:56:00.000-08:00

tonite my son is with his father, now his father is a total pos, i am so beyond mad so this is going to be a rant. i cant believe the lenghts my sons father will go, i totally regret ever being with him. the fact of the matter is, my son is with him right now and he left ethan call me to say goodnight but to make me mad, he hung up the phone on me, when i call back, if i didnt say goodnight within the first five seconds he would hang up on me, like im only allowed to say goodnight to my son. not even ask him how his day was. not do anything. What am i supposed to do? put up with this shit because of my son? corey has no rights. REPEATING he has no rights what so ever. so why do i have to put up with all this bullshit all the time? seriously? i chose to let ethan go over there to help my son out, cause believe me i get nothing out of it. I guess whenever i get him back im just going only let ethan call corey when he wants to, or tells me he does, no longer will i make him call him. no longer will i just let him have him every other weekend. because im sick to death of this.
I have no one to talk to and no one to get advice from. everyone i know is actually in a marriage with the person they have kids with and in love, and i feel like im the odd man out. corey has never been around. he was put in jail two days after i had ethan. then got out for a year. was still never around. would tell me he was coming to get ethan and never show up.

so now i finally got to tell ethan goodnight, after calling back to back 15 times in a row. after that corey has the nerve to tell me "youre welcome". fuck you, im not going to thank you for something that you should be doing and that i do for you on a nightly basis and wait, you didnt even do for me, cause you would hang up the phone on me. a person can only take so much before she snaps, yano?

i know im very personal on this blog, and im sure a lot of you are like, just deal with it, but when you are in the situation, its best to just vent, and then ask for advice. i dont know, i hope i dont offend anyone with anything i post.

here are some awesome quotes with some pretty pictures attatched!

2010-02-14T12:17:00.000-08:00

why am i fiening for spring? i just cant wait, the first nice day im going to go to the park, taking a blanket and just reading all day.

i of course will take a picnic, and it will be amazing. i might even fish to pass the time.

Spring will also mean my allerigies going into full blast. and humid humid days where my hair is a frizzy mess. but it also means, spring dresses!

i just bought this at forever 21, im stoked to wear it to be honest, i usually only wear dressed with black stockings, because im terribly afraid of my white legs. i was once told they looked like milk bottles, and that image has stayed with me forever lol

Other than sitting here dreaming about spring, a lot has happened in my life. I had to change my number because of Corey, seriously its gotten that bad. Ever since i found out that he was talking to his ex girlfriend behind my b ack, he refuses to be nice to me. Im pretty sure that if you do something bad to someone, they are the one supposed to be mad at you, not the other way around. I told him that there will be no more talk about us in a relationship and only talk about ethan. He says he wants to take me to court. I told him that we can sit down and type up an agreement and then going to a dmv and get it noterized. he still will not do that. that he doesnt need to sign anything to see his kid. I told him its not the most formal way of doing things but it will hold up in the court. and then he goes ona nd on about not wanting to see me and never talking to me again. Im sorry corey, but you have a kid with me, we will always have to talk, wether we go to the courts or handle it ourselves.

here is some parts of our converstation. i had asked him if he was bring ashley around ethan cause i felt as though i had a right to know who was around him

corey: anyway its no big deal.. i dont care 6:08 PM

Me: alright 6:08 PM

corey: whatever Courtney.. always the same god Damn answers.. 6:10 PM

corey: after this coming up friday, i dont want anything to do with you.. nothing 6:12 PM

corey: dont ask me for anything.. as soon as i get this job, im just going to go though the courts.. i dont trust you 6:14 PM

Me: you dont trust me because all i did was say alright? im sorry but im busy, i dont have time to sit here and discuss with you these things. 6:17 PM

Me: youre just mad cause youre not hearing the answers you want to hear. i told you why i wanetd to know, why do youw ant it to be a bigger thing then it is? 6:17 PM

corey: you never did before either, only if you get something from it.. 6:18 PM
-------------------------
corey: (RE:2/2)no thats bullshit.. its was never about me.. if you were pissed about anything it was always my fault or you blamed me and that happend when it w 6:24 PM

corey: asnt my fault.. 6:24 PM

Me: why does it even matter what our relationship was? that is over and done with, right now and forward its just about ethan. and us raising him together. 6:25 PM

Me: yet you want to go into this huge thing and hate me because i wont be wtih you bcause of what you did. you keep fucking me over and then bitch when ive had enough 6:25 PM

Me: you think its fair to ethan to have his dad and mom fight? no its not, ive been nothing but civil with you, youre the one that wants to fight all the time. 6:26 PM

Me: the thing is, youre always going to have to deal with me, even if the courts decide it. even if the judge gives you those days, we will still have to talk. 6:26 PM

Me: i dont know why you cant just be nice to me like you were when you were in jail, why you have to fight wtih me 6:26 PM

corey: i dont like you, thats why.. 6:27 PM

Me: you dont like me because i wont be with you. ive done everything, told you to call ethan, trying to give you days to see him. but you want to fight, thats great for ethan. 6:28 PM

Me: hes going to grow up and think, oh my dad didnt call me because he doesnt like my mom, or he didnt come see me cause he doesnt like my mom. 6:29 PM

Me: you think youre hurting me, but youre hurting ethan. its kind of sad that you got to stoop to this level, that you cant just be an adult and grow up and realize you have a kid, you need to man up and realize that it takes a lot to riase a child 6:29 PM

corey: because youre mad that im friends with her.. youre jealous 6:19 PM

Me: never did what? 6:19 PM

Me: im not jealous. believe me, but i have a right to know whos around my kid, you can be friends with whoever you wantyou can be with who ever you want,justdidntthink it would be a week later 6:20 PM
Me: you think i like you? not in the very least but im the one telling you to call ethan, im the one asking you if you want to take ethan for the weekend, im the onetrying to get you involved in his life. 6:30 PM

corey: (RE:2/2)will you shut the fuck up.. i cant even hear your voice and youre giving me a headache.. 6:31 PM

Me: you just want to go to court with me because its you know it will be longer till you have to man up and be a father. 6:31 PM

corey: (RE:2/2)COURTNEY, EVERY FUCKING TIME I CALL TO TALK TO HIM YOU TELL ME YOU TOO GOD DAMN BUSY.. SO FUCK YOU! 6:32 PM

Me: fine ill just tell ethan that you dont want to see him this weekend. goodbye 6:32 PM

corey: no, i want to go to court so when the judge grants me my rights for him i can laugh in you face.. 6:33 PM

Me: youre insane, because he was sleeping when you FINALLY called? okay, and i work take care of ethan and have school i dont have time to sit on the phone texting you why i dont want to be wtih you, its not even about that 6:33 PM

Me: why would it even matter if the judge grants you rights, im trying to give them to you anyways, you moron. 6:33 PM

------
i know that i should keep my cool and not call him names but he makes me so angry. he wnats to take me to court to get "rights" when im trying to let him see his kid and talk to him and he wont.
I changed my number and made a google voice number and gave him that, that way i can block him if he starts harassing me. it also can record converstations you have with someone, and i have a lot saved where he is royally going off on me, and it saves every single text message ever. so i think i have a pretty good case that i have tried to let ethan and corey have a relationship.

other than that my father had a surgery to put a stint in his heart, and everything went okay, he stayed in the hosptial longer than expected because his emzymes were low, but everything is okay now!
thank you for anyone who prayed or even thought about him in any way.

Today is valentines day and me and my ex (another one who im very good friends with ) are going to see valentines day at the movies, i hope its really good.

I have been doing a lot of interior decorating, even though i still live with my parents, i buy all this stuff to store away so when i get my degree and move out, im not sitting on milk crates looking at the mall
here is some of my inspiration.

the last one is my old art teachers house. you cant see what makes it amazing, but i used to clean his house for spare cash. He has records in every inch of his house, and it was just a really cool place.

I hope everyone has a wonderful valentines day! and i leave you with this

2010-02-08T21:59:00.000-08:00

basically last year around august my dad almost died. he had emphazema,(spelling?) and had a heart attack, and was swollen all over his whole entire body. we finally convinced him to go the hospital, i dont know what it is with males, they just dont want to admit anything is wrong. the drs basically put him straight on oxygen. well he wasnt still not getting enough oxygen on it, so they knocked him out and put him on a breathing machine. let me just explain something about my father. he smoked, almost two packs a day (he has since quit!) and he used to drink, and doesnt exercise, eats so poorly. well, recently my dad has been having heart problems and was put back in the hospital, and they are pretty sure they are going to have to do open heart surgery on him. its just tough, i can explain the story but i cant even explain my feelings, im speechless. recently i have lost my faith in god, so i feel like i cant even force myself to pray.
If you are religious, this is a huge deal. I will know more on thursday and i guess thats that.

I have also been having trouble in other aspects of my life as well.
Corey, my sons father is a competely , douche bag. very informal word but frankly its the best one out there for him.
he has been out of jail since the 17th of dec. I know, I pick the winners. I decided the christian thing to do was to forgive him and give him another change. I knew it would come back and bite me on the ass. He was texting his ex girlfriend when he first got out and i told him i didnt appericate it and if he wanted to work things out with me, he had to let the past go. he was okay with that and even showed me the bill to show he had not been calling or texting her. Well the other day he gives me his email address and password to check something and i get ont here and sure enough, two months and a half months worth of emails back and forth. what he had been doing is signing onto this on his phone and writing her there so it would not show up on the bill. he must have "forgotten" and i discovered it all.
i know its clishe but once a cheater always a cheater.
he then began a 4 hour long calling me and texting me and crying for me to forgive him but i cant. i just cant, i need to move on and even if my son hates me, at least i know i tried, for him, to be a "normal " family. but i cant be walked all over.

on top of that, i have been swamped with a feud between friends. A friend of mine is dating another "friend". they both tell me things not to tell theo ther person, and conscienciously put me in the middle of everything.

other tha that i have just been tied down with essay after essay for my english class. DARN YOU ENGLISH COMP.

with getting corey and those friends out of my life, and very hopeful tha tmy dad wil be healthy, and now its supposed to get better.

i will post more this week, i have a bunch of random pictures i need to post

and for my happy mail partner, i have not forgotten you!

2010-02-03T20:45:00.000-08:00

i am so sorry i have not been around. it feels like my life is basically crumbling around me and i have no means to stop it. have you ever left like that? i feel like i have no control over anything anymore, and im a christian and i pray but its not working to my favor, and its kind of making me loose faith. i dont know what to do anymore. i cant really explain right now but i promise to make a more detailed post no later than friday!

i hope you guys have having a good week. god bless

2010-01-18T16:17:00.000-08:00

I think I am just to the point where i am fed up with guys. i cant handle it anymore. what else am i supposed to do? the one person who i thought would change, well guess what? he didnt. anyone could see it coming. I dont relate to anyone and i dont even have that high of standards. I just want someone who isnt boring/annoying, someone that cares about family, is actually going somewhere in life. can hang out with my friends without having a panic attack and like freaking out, who isnt so negative all the time and whines alot. someone who likes watching movies, reading books and going to concerts. oh and who is decent looking, im shallow what can i say.

corey and i have not been getting along. he wants to try to work things out. and i have tried. but i just cant trust him, he tells me hes going to bed at 8 pm. of course i dont trust him and he gets mad, which just makes me think why are you going to bed then. are you just telling me this and really going out?

I hav given up, there is nothing to do. If you cant trust someone what else can you do?

yesterday this lady came into my work, i work at a dog groomers and asked me why her dog was in a cage, i began to tell her, that her dog didnt bite anyone or acted like it was going to but it did bark at other dogs so by law and regulations we have to lock it up. she began to flip out on me saying that thats out of her dogs nature and that her dog would never bark at another dog. her dog is a german shephard. and of course, he is a dog, its nature for them to bark. she said that she is not bringing him back ever and that its a shame i work at a dog grooming place. i told her its not a problem or and issue, but you asked why the damn dog was locked up so i wasnt going to lie to you. then she busted in the back where it clearly says employees only and goes, well if youre so scared of him ill get himself.
I dont hate the public but i dont really like it either. its not a shame i work at a dog grooming place. i dont actually groom the dogs, but if a big huge german shephard is barking at everything that walks by it, im not going to go up to it and pet it. i just cant believe the nerve of some people.
So she tells me that she is going to call my boss and tell her its a shame you have people like me working at a dog grooming place if i am scared of some of the dogs and that its not of this dogs nature to bark at at other dogs and it was something i was doing. i couldnt believe my ears. ITS A DOG! its going to bark, thats what they do. luckily when i talked to my boss

i made my valentines day cards for Lindsay's valentines day card swap

all my awesome supplies!

which one will YOU get?! lol

other than that, now will school starting up i have been super busy. i already wrote my first essay that is not due for another week but i figured it will give me some free time later this week to do nothing but relax and catch up on my dvr shows.
the weather here in st louis has been insane, after about 6pm you cant see the road, its so foggy

that is a shop n save, i was literally standing right in front of it and couldnt even see the sign.

my first full tank of gas in 2010! im a nerd but i take joys in the fact that im getting out of debt.

and thats all for now, but i leave you with this to go on your way...

p.s does anyone think they might want to do like a blogger showcase with me in it? i am seriously lacking on the follower front. it would be amazing if you could and i promise to repay you in any way shape or form. besides money, im really broke!

2010-01-13T16:57:00.000-08:00

i am so exhausted, ethan and i usually get up at 830. but since school started i have been getting up at 730 and its just been crazy. i dont know why losing an hour of sleep makes you so tired but it really really does. they dont even really waste any time before giving you loads of homework, which i did after work today so im all caught up, yay for long baths for the kid!

so since im like brain dead, ill leave you with some pictures.

look at this yucky spider i found in my MAILBOX! i dont have the heart to kill it but im pretty sure its pregnant. its huge! i did some reasearch and im pretty sure its a crabspider? i could be wrong. It will just guard my mail!

the cutest dog my boss owns at our work. Its a poodle and look at those big blue eyes!

it follows me around all day and i cant help but love it but i dont want to spend 700 on a dog!

i know its true but, damn, i got offended! mother gene i suppose, maybe if he wasnt so blunt.

ethan and myself.

1/12/10

is it me, or is DALE EARNHARDT in my city?! lol he does own a raceway here, but i doubt its him. why would you drive around in that and create attention if you were just visiting.

i know my town is the meth capital of the world ( it is sadly =[ ) but do we have to have hooisers as well?

today i found this tick at work, i work at a dog groomers so it probably came in on one of the dogs, but look at that thing! its huge. so since im a known tomboy, I......

cut it open~! it was FULL of blood. i have never seen a tick this big, but i did some research and its a cow tick. im used the smaller black ticks.

here is my banner, my computer sucks and i had to use paint! so bare with it lol

if you guys could put this on your page, and maybe make a post for people to add me? i would be FOREVER ( think of stand by me and the awesome chunk face jerry oconnell used to be)

the code is :

<a href="http://courtneytm.blogspot.com/"> <img src="http://i49.tinypic.com/2me7sk3.png" /></a>

time and time again

2010-01-11T20:14:00.000-08:00

today has been, i dont even know the word for it really. I started school today, i have not been in school since 2004. that is when i dropped out. I was oddly nervous when i woke up this morning but i got to school and everything was fine. it was psychology and she did not waste anytime making us take notes and stuff and giving us homework. next class we have to dress up as our "favorite mental illness" and i have no idea what to do. everyone is going to do bi polar and stuff so i dont want to do that. i was thinking Trichotillomania. and buying a cheap wig at the halloween store that stays open year round and just pulling about some of the hair and cut it in round patches and have some laying on the desk around me. or is this pathetic? What are some of your suggestions?

I have been fighting super badly with the ex. Ethans father, i jsut dont know what to do anymore. I dont know how to control the fights once they are started, its so complicated. Friday night he calls me up and tells me he wants ethan the next night and that he was going to bed and calling me when he woke up, i said okay. i waited and waited, he doesnt have a cell phone because he just got out of jail in dec and his parents each have cells. no house phone. i called both of them. neither answered, so i called them back in a hour and let ethan leave a message, still no answer. i finally get a call around 2 pm. its him. he tells me hes at his friend joshs house. i said okay how long have you been over there. to which he replied 730 this morning. i knew that was a total lie. i have a kid and i dont even wake up that early (okay i do now cause school has started but still, at this point, it was a vaild point lol) i just knew in the pit of my stomach that something wasnt right yano. girls i know you get that ify feeling, that sick to your stomach, blood pumping, heart racing, anxious feeling, you are usually right? well usually i am, so i said, cut the shit corey just tell me whats up, he finally admitted that he had went over there after i got off the phone with him and stayed the night.
i dont care what he does. but DONT LIE TO ME, i dont get why he has to, and why he feels the need to, but its fucking annoying.

so heres a list of things i was angry about
-he didnt even let me know he was leaving, without a phone, and wouldnt be there the next day when he was supposed to get ethan, knowing i would call
-lied to me about being there at 730 in the morning.
- waiting untill 2 to even call me, when he knew he wanted ethan, so if i had anything planned for the daytime, i would be screwed

I want to point out i am not mad if he goes and hangs out with his friends, we arent even together. even if we were i dont try to control my boyfriends, but in this circumstance, it was beyond messed up

Ethan goes to bed at 830. if he left joshs, he would get home , and get the car adn finally be at my house around 430, and then wouldnt return to his house till 5. okay, i dont see why you would waste most of theday with your friends but whatever.

so we argued which turned into, im a bitch, im a that, im a this. but what really took the cake is the fact that he said "he is MY son."
EXCUSE ME?! you were in jail for three years. and even before then you werent dad of the year, so let me correct you. you cannot even claim you are anything but a sperm donor untill you prove it.
we argued some more and all the past came up. i finally snapped at him and he shut up. he did end up getting ethan, and then brought him home the next day. but not untill 8. again he goes to bed at 830 and i was annoyed that i would only get 30 or so mins with him before he goes to bed. corey could not understand this and we had begun to argue some more. he finally calmed down and said, i only get so riled up because you get mad and yell at me (well stop doing stupid things?) and call me names ( i dont call a shoe a shoe, unless its a shoe, wait what?! lol) so i fire back. we lack the communication so very badly. so maybe just maybe things can get better? i dont know, he wants to talk about it on thursday when i have my break from classes.

i dont get why baby mamas get all the bad reps, i dont cause any problems, i dont start any shit. i just want my son to know his dad, and have a little free time (im entitled!).

half of those girls if not a third of them, the dads wants to be in their kids life. i have to just beg for things to go right with mine. its just heartbreaking. i know three years in jail can change someone, so heres hoping!

school was fun and im glad im back in it, it makes me feel like im actually going somewhere in my life
the teacher was calling out roll call and said "courtney quinn, that sounds like a movie star's name" and i dont think she meant dr quinn medicine woman either lol.

only the lonely

2010-01-10T20:29:00.000-08:00

Kaelah tagged me in 7 things post over at her blog (by the way check her out!) so I'm going to attempt to do it myself.

1. I hate being single and I hate being in a relationship. I dont want to have someone ask me where i am and what im doing and feel guilty for being a little flirty, because thats who i am, but i hate being single, esp when i see a couple and they are being really cute and have the same style and a little bit of me dies inside.

2. I am the black sheep of my family. but in a good way if that makes sense. All my family either has a co dependancy of alcohol or pot. I dont drink or do drugs, they let it control them. this is not my extended family, just my immediate family.

3. I can resite movies and tv shows with no problem, but when it comes to songs i can never remember the words. and at times it really drives me crazy. I usually just make up my own words so i dont look like an idiot. but i always say them quietly so no one can really hear it.

4. I am obsessed with marilyn monroe. I find her life inspiring. I usually get into fights with my parents, friends, neighbors, even strangers on her death and her life and defend her. she is someone i can really relate to, she had mental disease and i have ocd, and she was just trying to be the best actress and wife and survive, and im just trying to be the best mother and friend and survive.

5. When i was younger all i wanted to be was a stand up comedian, i would sit and watch comedy central all the time, i was really outgoing and hyper in high school, but then after that i became shy and i felt like i could never go on stage and do that, so i have changed my mind

6. Im super shy when you first meet me, but after i warm up to you, i will never shut up. in my group of friends i have to be the center of attention. its hell for my boyfriends to get me to meet their families, i never want to do it. i get all sweaty and i dont know what to talk about, so i just sit tehre like a fly on the wall.

7. i am very short tempered. it takes a while for me to get fired up but once i do there is no stoping me, its true what they say about red heads, we are crazy!

I dont even have seven people on my followers list so i tag the five people i do have! lol

2010-01-08T21:18:00.000-08:00

Today has been such a lazy day. I woke up and went to the post office to get the giveaway prize from kaelah bees blog. they could not deliever it because of my drive way. i absoultley love it!

(i had already put the cupcake ornament on my tree, yes its still up! i am lazy)

Also today I worked on my painting by numbers. it was one of my new years resolutions to finish one. here is the progress i have made thus far.

day one

I picked out the hardest one with the most detail. I turn on the music and turn off my phone and it really is relaxing. I suggest you guys try it

After i got it from the post office and painted I went to target and finally tried on that Rodarte for Target blue dress and a couple of other things.

I bought it to see what i can do with it. obviously i am not going to wear the black bra with it, but i wasnt going to try it on without one.
Hopefully it can look right on me or to ebay it goes! I tried on a bunch of their other stuff from the collection, but nothing looked right on me, i wanted the ribcage dress but it was out of my size, i might go to another target just to see.

I also cleaned a lot to get ready for school. im kind of nervous about it really. its been a long time and i need to get some things figure out on how to study and whatever because i have no skillz lol

In boy news, im still single, like always but i kind of like it that way. I made amends with one of my exs. two years in the waiting. i dont plan on ever getting back together with him or anything, but its nice that im on good terms with every single one of my exs. even the ones that were the horrible break ups. you know the kind were you call over and over and over till they pick up, you fight and then someone hangs up only to repeat the cycle over and over again.

okay well that is all for now, hopefully more things start to pick up so i have actually stories to tell.

things i need to do before sunday
-get my eyebrows waxed
-put my parking sticker on my car
-clean out my trunk in my car
-SLEEP

and yes, i have seen the bangwagon and jumped on it.

http://www.formspring.me/courtneyTM

2010-01-08T17:28:00.000-08:00

Okay now that I have figured some of this out, lets get an introduction going.

I am Courtney. HI! I will never be perfect at my grammar. I just type a little to fast to care i suppose.
I am 23 and Im a mother to a son who is four. We both live in St. Louis MO. Just think of the state with the Arch in it.

I am a student at the local community college here.

I am battling o.c.d and trying to find other alternatives to medicine for my cure.

My passions are Fashion, Photography, Film, Literature, and Journalism. I also collect owls and marilyn monroe stuff.

Maybe one day I can photograph the stars and models on the runway and write about them in a newspaper or magazine.

maybe one day.

from this i hope to document my life and just have it as a way to look back on things, harriet the spy style.

I hope to just have an outlet and be happy and have it be a postive experience while i share my life with all of you.

This is my son and myself, we like to be goofy.

things that inspire me

LOOK AT ALL THAT STORAGE! my heart is melting!

mmmm vintage.

well that is all for now.

2009-12-29T17:59:00.000-08:00

i just started this blog, im usually on livejournal but i want to start following people on here.

please give me time to figure all this out =]

and please follow my friends blog